Then The Stars Fell From The Sky

In the horizon, Eret could see, the wasteland was burning under the hot, orange sun. The air rippled from the heat like waves of the ocean he had never seen. His throat felt dry, the rib bones were visible under the sunburned skin. Food was scarce and everything he had found, he had offered to the Gods to please them. He believed that the suffering of the body would lead him closer to other worlds. He wanted to learn how to move between time and space like his father, and his father before him, but Eret had a wild mind, untamed, that could not be silenced. He was unable to concentrate and lose control. His head was filled with so many voices, he was not sure which one was his own anymore. His father had tried to cure him from that disease of the mind but he had been unsuccessful. That was why Eret left his family and went to live in isolation.

It was a long way to the sacred grove. Eret made the journey barefoot. He sat on the shore of the big, blue lake and stared at the stone wall that had paintings on it. He had made those paintings: reindeer and bears, wolves and foxes, human in between, part of the nature not detached from it. The red paint depicted a world divided in three layers: on top were the world of Gods, in between the human world and under it the underworld where the dead and the dark spirits roamed. Eret wanted to move between these worlds and learn their secrets. He wanted to see the past and the future, to understand what it all meant but he was stuck in his human world. He was stuck in his body because of his underdeveloped mind. He was painfully aware that there was something wrong inside of him, something he was not able to explain.

He reached his hands into the warm water and washed his face. The picture of the burning wasteland came back to him. What does it mean? It was 1^st of August and the nature was soon to turn into autumn, soon it was time for harvest, Eret thought. He should go back to his family to help them get ready for winter. A lonely crow cawed on the branch of the downy birch. The bird was watching Eret and their eyes met. Eret tried to clear his mind in order to listen to what the bird was saying but again these many voices started to whisper lies in his ears.

“The stars will fall from the sky...” One voice said.

“The sun and moon will burn out...” Another whispered.

“And the earth will be no more...” Came the third.

“Stop that”, Eret said out loud and shook his head. The voices were describing the end of the world, he knew. That was the only thing they were telling him. And he could not hear anything else.

“Please, stop”, he repeated.

Suddenly, the crow took flight, its wings flapping and feathers fluttering. It flew right towards Eret. He raised his hands to cover his face but the bird started pecking on his skin.

“No!” Eret yelled and leaned backwards. He lost his balance and fell into the lake. But the lake had no bottom and he sank deeper and deeper and the blue water turned green and then gray. Come with me, he heard the crow cawing inside his head. Let go, don’t fight.

He tried to relax and felt how the stream pulled him deeper, carrying him away. Everything turned black and then he saw the lake from above. He saw his own body lying on the shore under him lifeless, and he panicked. The voices started to speak all at the same time and he felt horrified.

No, no, no! He tried to yell but no voice came out of his mouth. He tried to move but could not feel his body. Let go, the crow repeated. But he could not. The panic took hold of him, he was terrified.

And then he woke up.

Eret was back in his village, helping his people. The first snow had fallen early that year and the ground was covered in white cotton. The sun hung lower in the sky every day and the nights were getting longer. Eret could hear his father playing the drum and chanting in a monotone voice on the bottom of the fell were spirits gathered. Eret’s mother came to him and put her hand on his shoulder.

“Are you still hearing the voices?” Mother asked Eret.

“Yes. They come to me now in my dreams as well. They speak of the end of the world”, he answered.

“Those are the voices of demons, my love. They are tricking you. The end of the world is not yet to come in centuries. We don’t speak about that”, his mother said kindly.

“I know. I wish I was healthy. I wish father could heal me. I wish he could free me from my demons”, Eret whispered. His voice was tired and crackling.

“Last night I saw a dream so vivid I thought I was awake. I saw a white deer, bigger than other deer, I saw it die and collapse to the ground. I saw the snow cover the corpse, then suddenly it was raining ash instead of snow. Then the stars fell from the sky.”

“I don’t want to hear it”, his mother told him and shook her head.

“Go to sleep”, she ordered.

The harsh winter storm blew thick snow around in swirls. Eret saw the forest trees bent so that they looked like they could snap and break anytime. His boots left deep footprints on the snow. He could still feel the heat from the burning wasteland somewhere far away, something in that vision had burned into his retinas forever, it was calling him. It felt as if there was a fire slowly growing inside his heart. Every night the stars fell in his dreams after the first deer was struck down. Every waking hour he was waiting for the world to end.

Then, he stopped. He had heard something. He hid behind the snowy white trees and listened. Between the heavy tree trunks he saw his mother and father speak to each other. They had not noticed him.

“The crow is asking my help. He comes to me, because our son will not leave with him. The crow is the spirit animal who’s tasked to lead him into the underworld but he won’t go”, Eret heard his father tell.

“It’s the demons in him. I am worried. I am afraid of him, to be honest”, his mother told.

“It’s not just the demons. I know you don’t want to hear this but I think, we should look for another kind of healing. I think we should take him to see what they call a psychiatrist. I think his mind is ill in a way that I don’t have the knowledge to heal”, Eret’s father said.

“No. I say no. And we do not discuss this again”, his mother answered in a determined voice. Then they started walking away.

Eret leaned his back towards the tree trunk and sobbed. He felt feeble, lonely, afraid. He knew there were demons inside him. He was afraid of what they would do to him. But he never thought his old-fashioned father would suspect he was mentally ill.

“I just need to follow the crow and go to the underworld, then I can leave my demons there and be born anew”, he whispered to himself.

That very night the crow returned. It sat beside his bed and looked at him. He could now see that the crow’s eyes were the color of an amethyst and they looked ancient.

You are ready to go now? The crow asked tilting its head.

Yes, Eret answered in his sleep. He was lying on his back and suddenly, he felt how he started to grow roots. They stretched and burrowed into the ground deeper and deeper. He could see the layers of earth flashing by, centuries of history. He came across a fountain so pure he had to stop and drink from it. Then he dug deeper and deeper and in the end he reached the earth’s core of lava. He felt the warmth fill his heart. He was relaxed. The voices had been silenced. There was only emptiness.

Come with me, the crow cawed and Eret opened his eyes. He was flying above a desert filled with bones. In the horizon he saw the wasteland burning and then… Someone was coming.

Don’t go there, come with me, the crow said but Eret could not move. He stared at the one coming, he had to know. This was his vision coming to life.

It was a skeleton riding a skeleton horse. The eye sockets of the man were empty and black but Eret could feel that the skeleton saw right into his soul.

“I’ve been waiting for you, Eret”, the skeleton said. Eret could feel that under the bones the man was smiling.

“Now, it’s time to fill your destiny.”

Eret woke up in the snow. He was cold, so very cold. He raised his hands and saw that they were covered in blood. He panicked. He could not remember how he got there. In the snowy branch of the downy birch the crow was sitting and said to him: you stepped astray. I cannot help you anymore. And then the bird turned into ash that vanished into the cold air.

Eret could see smoke rising in the distance. All of a sudden he felt like throwing up. The smoke was coming from the village. He rushed towards it and the fear filled his heart.

When he got there, he saw that everything had been burned down. There were charred bodies lying on the ground, the bones were broken. He knew what it meant to break a skeleton. He cried in disbelief. Among the corpses sat his father. Eret ran to him.

“What happened?! Where’s mother?” He asked. Slowly his father raised his head and revealed his mutilated face.

“You happened. Don’t you remember. You came into the village and slaughtered everyone. You broke the bones so that none of these people can get a new body in after life. They are now doomed to live without a new descended body, just free spirits lost in time. You are the end of the world. You have killed the first deer and you will make the stars fall from the sky. You will burn out the sun and the moon and you will see that the earth is no more. I should’ve recognized the face of death. You are not my son. I curse you demon!” The father said and collapsed to the ground dead.